What makes you post your affairs in a blog?

When I first started “meeting” S, I started out just noting a little code, or a few scribbled words in my contacts diary in my handbag. It was really just to remind me of my “cycle” and to avoid any worries that that may cause. When my husband J asked what the scribbles were, he became incredibly aroused all over again, remembering what we’d done immediately after I’d come home those evenings. I was excited by his excitement, so I started making the entries a little more detailed, and a little more explicit. He’d ask me to bring out the diary every so often in bed, and recall the events of that evening all over again. As a bit of a tease, and a fun-gift, and as a special “thank you” for letting me enjoy myself . . . I printed-off a little diary booklet from the computer. He loved that even more, and asked me to keep adding to it. As the children got a little older, that became less “safe” to do, so we expanded it into a diary on the computer . . . It wasn’t long before J was suggesting I publish it as a “blog”. I was horrified at first, but became more and more excited by the idea . . . and eventually, three years ago, uploaded my first entry.

To my complete surprise emails started appearing in my “inbox” . . . and I’ve enjoyed doing it ever since. I suppose I enjoy the thrill, and the flattery . . . but also the sense of wanting to share and “shout about” the joy and immense love that our lifestyle has given us. If it can work for us, it can surely work for others as well!!

Are you swingers . . . Or have you ever had a three-some?

No we are not swingers. And I have never been involved in a three-some.

Whilst the “idea” excites me . . . and J has often (and still does) suggested it is his “biggest fantasy”  . . . I just couldn’t feel relaxed enough to be myself. I would just feel uncomfortable and wouldn’t be able to let myself go as I really like to do when I’m with my lover.

Can we arrange to meet? Are you looking for a new lover?

No, I don’t have either the time, or . . . to be perfectly honest . . . the inclination to meet any new people.

And, I have to say, that I just can’t imagine I could ever get involved with a stranger, or someone I have just exchanged email messages with.

I realise that people do meet people from on-line dating sites etc., but I could never do that. Sorry!!!

How many men have you had?

You will probably be disappointed to learn that . . . apart from my husband J . . . I have only had sex with five other men. And only three of them more than once!

Have you ever had sex with a woman?

No. Sometimes I think the “idea” is exciting . . . but I have never found myself in that sort of situation.

How did you start your first affair?

I knew S for several years before we became lovers. It was my husband J who first pointed-out to me that S “fancied me”. Our children started out at the same school together and I would walk them in with his wife every morning . . . as the children continued their friendship, J and I would meet S and his wife quite regularly at school functions etc. We worked together on fund-raising events and helping organise sports days and school fairs etc.

J’s continual teasing about the “interest” that S had in me, turned into a part of our love-making games. But I never took J’s suggestions seriously and never believed that S was really “interested” in me at all.

I would occasionally bump into S as he walked his dog through the local park during my early morning Saturday jogging hour. We started stopping to share a coffee together in the park cafe . . . and as these “accidental” meetings started to become more regular, I began to think that perhaps J was right after all.

Our chats became longer and longer and, over a period of some months, eventually led to S suggesting we meet for drinks one evening at a local pub where his friends played live music. Nothing happened that evening, but I completely enjoyed myself . . . Just doing something different, and in different company, was refreshing and exciting in itself. More evenings followed over the next few weeks . . . still with nothing happening apart from enjoying each others company.

J was, of course, overjoyed and our own sessions became more and more excitable as he kept bringing-up my evenings out with S. I found myself enjoying J’s obvious enjoyment and began thinking “what ifs”.

But I could never believe I would actually be able to go through with it.

Then, one half-term S explained his wife was taking the children away to her parents for a few days and would I like to come round one evening for coffee . . .

And . . . “it” just happened !!! And, now, over nine years on, it still is !!!

Don’t you feel guilty about sleeping with another woman’s husband?

I did feel terribly guilty when I first started my affair with S. I told J I couldn’t understand how he could not be jealous about me having sex with another man, and what would happen if “she” found out. What if it destroyed their marriage? And he would just say “What’s to be jealous about? It’s just sex, why shouldn’t you be able to enjoy sex with someone else? It’s not about falling in love with someone else!” BUT . . . it still took OVER A YEAR of meeting for coffee, walks in the park, meals in downtown restaurants, BEFORE that first kiss, first caress and first consumation with S. I returned home very late that evening feeling horribly guilty and not sure of what I had just done, but J was just wonderful. We talked and talked and then made the most passionate love we’d made for ages . . . his excitement and enjoyment of what I’d just done was obvious and we both just got swept away with the thrill of it all. I remember waking in the morning feeling turned-on all over again, thinking of having made love to two different men in the same evening.

Later on of course I started feeling terribly guilty again. How could I even look at S’s wife, let alone engage in conversation with her in the school playground, or at the local shops? (Although we were not exactly close friends we would bump into each other quite often). But, over the course of the next few weeks, talking more and more with J I just realised he was right. It wasn’t as if I had any intentions of trying to change S’s life, or situation, I wasn’t threatening his marriage in any way at all. I was just sharing a physical emotion with him, not trying to take him away from his wife or family. He had told me often enough that they were just going through the motions, never had sex together, never even kissed anymore. Of course I know there are two sides to every story, but I had noticed on several occasions when we’d been at school meetings together etc. or things would come-up in conversation, that she was dismissive of him and didn’t seem to show any emotion or affection towards him. And he was, and still is, such a genuinely nice man. Both J and myself, had always got along with him really well for years before our affair started.

So as our affair blossomed. I would still feel awkward and a little “guilty” at times, and it took me a long time before I would go into “their” bedroom, but as the months went by it became easier and more fulfilling. It seemed to make J and I even closer and we realised even more just how important and satisfying it was to make time for each other. For my part I feel it made me feel more confident about my personality and sexuality. I felt better about myself and even better about my husband and family. I suddenly found myself just loving them, and kissing them, and enjoying being around them even more than I had before.

AND, over the next few months (and now) years . . . S would tell me how our affair had “saved” his marriage. Now you might say that he “would say that wouldn’t he!”, but actually I really do believe him when he says that his love, and then his respect, for his wife had long since disappeared even before we began our relationship. He had stayed with her just for the sake of his children. Initially J could never believe that they could still sleep in the same bed but not be intimate with each other. But knowing his wife (and we still occasionally come into contact with each other at school functions or the local shopping centre) I do believe him. And, anyway, after all these years now, S has nothing to gain by telling me things that aren’t actually true.

I have been incredibly lucky, and I realise that not very many people can live, and accept, the sort of relationship that my husband and I share . . . but in a strange way, experiencing how wonderful and enrichening and enlivening our “open relationship” has been, just makes me want to shout about it even more. In a way that is a part of the reason why I publish my diary . . . yes, it gives me a thrill (J calls it my “exhibitionist streak”) . . . But part of it is to say “look how wonderful this can be! No Jealousy! No Guilt! Why can’t everybody be like this !!!”

You mention your toys. What sort of toys and how many do you have?

Almost from the very beginning of our relationship, J and I had always played with toys. He bought me my first vibrator just a few months after we’d been together. Over the years he just kept buying more. We now have a small suitcase full!! It’s mainly vibros and wands, but some other things as well! But it’s not as though we use them all the time . . . it’s just fun really. Just to add a little difference and excitement when we have the chance.

Do you swallow?

No !!

Do you make your husband lick your lovers cum out of you(???)

J does like to kiss me, and lick me, all over when I come home from one of my evenings out, but I don’t actually like anyone to come in my pussy except for him. S likes to come in my bottom, but it took me a long time to want to let him do that, but he knows I don’t want him to come inside my pussy.

But anyway! It is usually at least an hour or so afterwards before I see J, so by then everything has long been “cleaned up” !!!! . . .

What happened to M?

I didn’t want to talk about this for a long time . . . but I no longer see M. He had a very outgoing personality and was initially fun to be with.

But he discovered that his partner had been having a long-term affair with her boss when they went away on business trips together. (Her job involved a lot of travelling). M took it very badly and threw her out of their apartment. I tried telling him he was being unreasonable . . . and (obviously) hypocritical and that he should forgive and try to resolve things sensibly. (She apparently did not want to leave him, and, once she’d been found out, told M that she would end the affair straight away). But he wouldn’t listen and sent her home to her mothers. I met him once more after this (we didn’t have sex!!) but he became increasingly silly and argumentative when I told him how unreasonable and spiteful I felt he was being towards her . He started calling me all the time at the office and on my mobile.

It all got very sad, and very awkward. I told him I couldn’t see him any longer and had to get my secretary to stop accepting his calls . . . and I had to change my mobile number.

Very sad . . . and for a time, made me feel uncomfortable and perhaps more aware how “unusual” our lifestyle is.

But . . .  

Do you have any tattoos?

No !!

I would like to know if you see yourself as more of the dominant or submissive partner in your marriage? Also what about with S and V, are you more of the dominant one or submissive one in your relationships with them?

I don’t think either of us are particularly more dominant than the other. I suppose that J does suggest things more than I do, but he would never “order” me to do something . . . And I would NEVER like to be “ordered” into doing something I didn’t want to try. Normally things just seem to “happen” naturally. We’ve both always said we’d try anything at least once . . . and if we like it, I suppose we do it again. It’s nice and refreshing to try different things!!

Regarding S and V . . . I suppose I take the lead more with S. I do like to shock him occasionally by doing something different. Perhaps it’s because I want to be “the best” with him. I want to feel special and (better than . . . !!).

I haven’t really known V long enough to have developed a particular relationship in that way with him. Initially I felt a little “reserved” and awkward being with him. More recently it has been much easier to be myself . . . but again things just seem to happen without either one of us particularly instigating it.

What would you do if your husband asked you to stop seeing your lovers?

I would stop!

What do you do with your lovers that you don't do with your husband?

It's more the other way round actually. There are lots of things I could never do with anyone else other than J. But different people like different things don’t they. V likes my nipples and seems to like to play with them and suck them for ages. S likes my bottom . . . and if I’m in the right mood I just like everything!!

Does your husband have sexual relations with other women or does he stay faithful to you?

No J doesn’t have a lover. When he first started encouraging me to see S, I kept asking “Is it just because you want to see someone else as well?” But he insisted it wasn’t and that he didn’t have “a mistress on the side”. He says he just doesn’t meet other women in his work or in our everyday life and even if he did, he thinks he has long since lost the “chat-up lines” or ways of approaching another woman. I’m sure that other women would find him attractive and certainly “sexciting” to be with, but he keeps telling me that he isn’t interested . . . and that sharing in my adventures gives him much more fun and satisfaction than trying to get involved with another woman. However, I keep telling him that I know he wouldn’t turn it down if it was offered to him!!!

And yes, I have often thought “how would I feel if he did sleep with another woman”. Well . . . the answer is . . . I would just have to accept it wouldn’t I ?? After all, what’s good for the goose is good for the gander! But I’m sure I would probably worry a little that, perhaps, someone else would be better than me, or more attractive, or more exciting. But one thing that I have learnt from our lifestyle, and my experiences over the past nine years or so, is that my affairs have actually brought J and I closer to each other, and made our own relationship stronger and more fulfilling. So if J did meet someone else, I would draw on my own experiences and try to put any thoughts of jealousy out of my head . . . and just say to myself that it should just be another exciting chapter in our marriage.

Do you smoke?

Very, very occasionally.

I smoked when I first met J (in my teens!!!) but he didn’t like it and asked me to stop. So I did, immediately! I never smoked again until about six or seven years ago when J suddenly decided that he found watching a woman smoke to be very arousing!!! (He’s never smoked in his life!!!) He asked me to smoke for him . . . and so I did. But only infrequently and just as part of our sexy times, usually late at night after the children had gone to bed, or when we were out together at a bar or restaurant. I wouldn’t say I particularly liked or needed to smoke . . . I just found it enjoyable and arousing because I knew how much it aroused him.

But as the children have become older and now go to bed much later . . . and, since the smoking ban in bars and restaurants in the UK, we just don’t get as much opportunity as we used to. So . . . I haven’t smoked now for over a year actually.

Do you just sleep with other men because your husband can’t satisfy you?

No, absolutely not !!! We have always had a great sex-life together. We both love sex and since our very first few months together J was always enticing me to try new and different things. He has always had a high sex drive!.

He always waits up for me to come home when I’ve been out with my lover, and our sex then is often very, very aroused and quick!!! . . . but in the immediate few days afterwards, we always have some of our most passionate and loving times together. I suppose the fact that knowing how naughty I’ve been, and knowing how much J enjoys that, makes me feel extremely aroused . . . and then just feeling his touches and caresses, and whispering little remembered incidents of my last meeting to each other, (him to me, as well as, me to him!) . . . just seems to make our love-making even more passionate and exciting. So being able to have my adventurous lifestyle without any secrets and jealousies, just enhances our own relationship and makes it even better and stronger (not just sexually either, but in other ways as well).

But I’m sure that even were I not having an occasional evening with my lover, then our own sex life would still be wonderful and adventurous. We both enjoy and need it too much!!!

Do you always “come” again with your husband immediately after seeing your lover?

J is almost always waiting up for me on the sofa when I arrive home (see above) . . . and whilst we always certainly have passionate “cuddles”, we may not always have complete sex. Normally he will “come” whilst I cuddle him and tell him all about my evening. Sometimes I will want or need more, sometimes not . . . but we usually wake early the next morning and start the day with wonderfully passionate sex and over the next few days we will BOTH enjoy the most lovely intense times together.

Do your lovers know you also see other lovers?

No !!!

Do you orgasm every time you have sex?

No I don’t. But I don’t believe it’s always about having an orgasm. I just enjoy the feelings and sensations . . . and the naughtiness of experiencing different things with different people. I don’t have to come every time to enjoy myself. I get enjoyment and satisfaction from my man enjoying himself as well. Being intimate with someone is just as much about “giving” . . . and sharing . . . not just about “receiving”.

What is the best experience you’ve ever had with one of your lovers?

I don’t think there is any one occasion of things being better than any of the others. It’s always a little different each time I have an “evening out” (as J and I call them) . . . that’s what makes it all such fun !!!

But really, I suppose just the fact that I can have such experiences, and share them with J, and know that I don’t have to worry about hiding my desires . . . is what makes every occasion so wonderful and so exciting. It’s the freedom of just knowing that I can do something if I want to . . . that makes every experience “the best”.

Do you have any piercings?

For my earrings . . . but nowhere else !!!

Do you ever fear your children or family friends might find out?

The most awkward question I get asked!!!

I so want to say "no" . . . and certainly regarding "friends", the SHORT answer is that, from my own point of view, I wouldn't care if they knew . . . Because?? Well, because many of my friends have less than perfect marriages for one reason or another (some of them have done things, or are doing things, that their husbands don't know about), and I often want to tell them how wonderful our relationship is . . . one of the reasons, though not the only one, why I so enjoy publishing this diary!!

But the LONG answer is that, of course, I know it doesn't work like that. I know that the "gossip" could do so much harm to my lover and his family, and of course, my own.

Regarding my children? Yes, of course I worry. Not because I think that our lifestyle is actually "wrong", it's just that I know they just wouldn't understand. At their age, even into my thirties, (even though my generation was supposedly brought-up on the new freedoms of free love and the hippy lifestyle), I wouldn't have understood !!! So, yes of course, I do worry about that.

I would hope though, that if they ever did find out, that after the initial catastrophe and shock and disappointment . . . and with the passing of time, they would understand that, actually, they have in a way benefitted from my husbands and my lifestyle and openness. I truly do believe we have a more loving, and giving, relationship and family environment now than we did 10 years ago. And they are both beneficiaries of that.

I am NOT ashamed . . . But we both just realise that because of the morals and beliefs of all of those around us, that we have a responsibility to EVERYONE involved in our circle, to act with discretion and privacy. Something that is not always easy to balance between the thrills and excitements and dangers and fulfillments of our lifestyle.

How long do you think you can carry on seeing your lover(s)?

Gosh, two awkward questions in two days?

I really don't know! When I first began my "fling", with S, I don't suppose any of us thought it would last very long at all. And then for me to meet and become involved with another lover (or two) was even more of a surprise. As both of our children have gotten older, it does seem to be increasingly difficult to arrange times, convenient with the both of us, to meet with S. I suppose it will eventually fizzle-out. But it has been going such a long time now, it would be hugely disappointing to lose something that has been so wonderful for all of us.

Have you always enjoyed shocking people?

In my normal everyday life I am not the sort of person that shocks people. In fact, quite the opposite
. . . I am more confident than I used to be, but I still worry so much about not wanting to offend people that I sometimes find it hard to say what I really want to say.

But I suppose that the freedom of being with my lover, and knowing that they know that my husband knows, makes me feel even more "naughty". And so yes, in that sense, I do like doing or saying little things, and using language, that I would never "normally" do. I like it because it makes me feel special, and adventurous, and exciting . . . and I like it because I know my lover likes it as well. That extra little spontaneous element just adds to the occasion for both of us.

And the "release" of just being able to say and do things that I could never normally do, can be wonderfully exciting both at the time, but also later when I am telling J about it !!

So . . . I suppose the answer is . . . Yes !!!

Why don’t you have links on your page to other Hotwife sites?

I have previously had links on my diary page, but over a short period of time I found these led to lots of “silly” messages coming into my in-box . . . and I usually (though not always) found that most of these sites somehow didn’t seem “right” or “credible” to me.

However . . . a number of you have pointed out that this is a little hypocritical, and recently I have been sent some links of some diaries similar to my own, which have proved to be interesting, well-written and sensible.

So we do intend to include a “Links” page, probably from this FAQ page, in the near future. If you have your own diary-site that you would like us to add, please send us the details. All we ask is that it should be your own page, and should not have any advertising or pop-up screens.

Will you see R again?

Lots of questions about my “Spur-of-the-Moment moment”, but that’s how it will remain . . . just a one-off liaison.

The whole situation was (and is) just too risky, and too silly, to repeat. R is almost half my age. I just couldn’t go back to that house again (anyone could have returned home whilst we were in his room). His work (and workplace) is too “close to home” and, well, it just doesn’t feel right!

It was fun and exciting at the time (and thinking about it and re-living it later with J) . . . but . . . !!!  

Circumcised or uncircumcised?

I suppose that . . . aesthetically speaking . . . when they are flaccid, I prefer looking at a circumcised willy.

But when they are erect, I really don't have a preference . . . I enjoy them all !!!

What is the most embarrassing thing that’s happened?

Recently when my daughter found one of my re-chargeable vibrators by our bedside cabinet.

I’d put it down on the floor and plugged it into the wall socket between the bed and the cabinet as we always do. But then forgot about it. She’d gone into our room looking to borrow some make-up and wondered why the lamp wouldn’t turn on, then saw the blinking blue charging light down on the floor . . . !!!

Why have you cancelled your Facebook Account?

I have actually cancelled all my other Diary Accounts. (MySpace, Facebook, Windows Live etc.) . . . for three reasons really.

Firstly, I was just getting bored with having to spend so much time updating them. It is far easier, and much less time-consuming, to just have my one diary page.

Secondly, I just couldn’t keep-up with answering messages separately from each site . . . as many of you will have gathered, it’s difficult enough just answering all the emails I get to my (official) email address: edithsaffairs@yahoo.co.uk

Thirdly, and most importantly . . . we have both recently realised just how much time our children are spending on Facebook etc. so we just didn’t want the risk of them stumbling across my page on that site.

Have you ever had sex outside in the open?

When I first met J he was flat-sharing and I was still living at home so we didn’t have many opportunities for time alone . . . so we used to have our own favourite private “picnic spot” in Epping Forest near to my home. J kept a blanket in the boot of his car and we spent numerous late afternoons there (lovely memories thinking about it now that you have asked!).

I have also had one late night (early hours of the morning actually) adventure with S in the local park. It was in the first few months, when our relationship had just started, and we were meeting each other almost once a week! We were in those first throes of suddenly discovering each other and how exciting and passionate things could be. There is quite a secluded park bench (still there) set back and almost surrounded by a grove of trees. It was early autumn and still quite mild. I had a long skirt, but nothing underneath, and was able to sit on his lap, and our “cuddles” just developed into a short, but nice, time!

But all those occasions were a long, long time ago now. Don’t seem to have the need, or possibly even the desire, to do those sort of things now. (Although I must admit that thinking about them again, has given me little tingles!!)

Do you play with your vibrators when you are alone?

Yes, sometimes . . .

Do you talk to S about the things you do with J? Or does he (S) not ask those sorts of questions?

S and I do talk a lot about each others partner and family, but mainly it is about children, school, work etc. S knows I tell J about "everything" we get up to, and he knows that J enjoys hearing about our "evenings" together.

I suppose he used to ask more "detail" about what J likes when we first started seeing each other all those years ago . . . but he doesn't ask those sort of questions specifically now. .

Do you get a thrill from receiving comments on your blog and email messages?

It is flattering to see that people have commented on my diary page, and yes, I will admit that occasionally I get “tingles” from some of the remarks. But I also do find it very nice, and actually quite gratifying, to frequently receive email messages, from both men and women, that say how finding my diary has actually helped them in their own relationships.

They may not always feel emboldened enough to be able to open-up completely to their partners, but many tell me they have begun to be more understanding and more expressive in their desires, or situations. Or that they are perhaps more “at ease” with their own, or their partners, infidelity.  

That IS a nice feeling . . .

Why have you discontinued your Picture Gallery?

I started the gallery with just a few pictures, and just as a bit of fun really. People started asking for different pictures of different themes . . . pictures of my feet, or of me smoking, or with my toys etc. . . . and initially I found it quite arousing going through old pictures with J, or posing for new ones. But recently I’ve been feeling that some of them are not very flattering, or not really very “nice”. So I asked J to disable the Gallery for the present time.

He suggested we just take off the pictures that I didn’t like, but when I’m not in the mood I just don’t like any of them. And then when I am in the right mood, we end up getting so excited that I can’t make up my mind . . .  !!!

Are you a nymphomaniac?

LOL !!! Usually the sort of question I would ignore, but the same question has been asked, by different people, several times recently! (Is it something I’ve said in a post ?) Anyway . . . I’ve always thought that was one of those silly, fictional, terms and I certainly don’t know how you can define someone as being a nymphomaniac.

But . . . I do enjoy sex. The physical release can be really wonderful . . . but for me it is so, so, so much more than just simply a physical release. I really enjoy the emotional aspect of knowing I have the freedom to let myself go, and perhaps for just a few hours, allow myself to be someone else other than the normal, everyday, housewife and mother that everyone else thinks I should be.

And I enjoy the flattering, and sensual feelings of knowing I am still able to attract and excite and stimulate someone else. And it is also a wonderful feeling knowing that I can share my own freedom and give someone else that sense of release and satisfaction as well. I enjoy the talking and moments when I know that S is telling me things, emotions, fears, worries, that he feels he can’t share with anyone else.

Then finally, that emotional release for me is heightened even more when I know I will be returning home to J and be able to tell him everything, absolutely everything, that I have done and said and talked about. That is the most arousing and satisfying feeling of all. Knowing that our marriage grows stronger and that our relationship has helped S stay in his own marriage as well.

Does that make me a nymphomaniac ??

If both your lovers wanted to see you on the same night, who would you choose?

It would be whoever had asked me first !!! I would never cancel because one or the other asked me out after I’d already agreed a prior arrangement.

Do you have any regrets about anything you have done with your lovers?

I can honestly say I don’t regret anything I have done in respect to my “extra affairs”. When I first started meeting with S, I never thought that those first few spine-tingling kisses and touches would enrichen my life as much as they have . . . and that we would all still be sharing and enjoying them all these years later.

No, I don’t regret anything . . . it has been simply wonderful and I wish everyone could be lucky enough to experience the same excitement, affection, fulfilment and love as we all have.

Why don’t you write more about the things you do with your husband?

I started this blog simply as a record of my meetings with S, and just as a “gift” to my husband. It has grown into much more than I ever thought it would . . . but is still meant as just a diary of my meetings with my lover(s) and occasional thoughts or observations on Extra-Marital Affairs and “infidelity”, or the alternative sort-of lifestyle that we enjoy.

My times with my husband are different to that . . . wonderful and sensual, and fun and loving, and passionate and fulfulling . . . but private and special.

And . . . far too frequent for me to record and describe here !!!

Do you plan the things you will do before meeting with your lovers?

I do make sure I have “tidied-up all my bits and pieces” before an evening out. And I like to make sure I am happy with the clothes and shoes (and underwear) that I will be wearing. I do like to feel comfortable . . . and, I suppose . . . desirable, with what I have chosen to wear.

But, other than that, I don’t make any special plans on what we will do, or how I will act. Things just seem to happen naturally and if we are both in the right sort of mood and in the right sort of situation, it’s nice sometimes to just be “pleasantly” surprised with where our evening takes us.

I think, like most things in life, that if you try to plan things too much, it can seem to be like trying too hard and things falling short of expectations.

Do you prefer anal sex?

Absolutely NOT !!!

I don’t necessarily prefer one position, or one thing, more than any other . . . and certainly, I can’t even DO anal, of any sort, unless I’m completely comfortable and in the right sort of mood.

Things just happen, and situations (and positions), just seem to develop and fall into place if I feel aroused and relaxed. If I’m in the right frame of mind I will enjoy, or might try, most things . . . but I never, ever, know exactly what I will be doing, or what I want to be doing, beforehand.

Is there anything you wouldn’t do?

Yes, quite a few things actually!!

Although J and I have always said we’d try anything once, there are lots of things that I know I just wouldn’t find arousing, or sensual . . . and if I don’t feel comfortable about doing something, no amount of persuading would ever change my mind.

Have you ever “passed wind” during sex?

I get asked lots of questions which make me giggle and, usually, dismiss as being too silly, or not appropriate to answer. That was the initial reaction I had when this question appeared in my in-box, but . . . actually, all joking and embarrassment aside, it IS a valid question, because . . . well, it just occasionally happens doesn’t it?

I mean it’s different with ones own husband, but when it happens with a lover, it is awkward and embarrassing at first. I wanted to hide in shame the first time it happened when I was with S, but after a moment’s silence he just burst out laughing. Suddenly, it wasn’t a problem . . . it is only natural, after all, isn’t it. Not that it happens a lot of course, but just occasionally. And when it does I just whisper an apology and we carry on !!!    

Do you think you would ever have had an affair without your husband knowing about it?

I really don’t know is the answer!!!

I DO know that I certainly wouldn’t have been able to start my meetings with S, were it not for the fact that J first pointed out S’s interest in me. And, even then, I wouldn’t have been able to follow-it-through, and let myself go, without J’s constant encouragement. But over the past ten years I have realised how flattering, and exciting, and tempting, and flirtatious it is to occasionally find oneself in a situation where it is obvious that someone else is “interested” in you.

J says I would never need “much” encouragement and that I would eventually have ended up having an affair with someone . . . even if the situation with S had never arisen.

But . . . thankfully . . . we’ll now never need to wonder. And we both agree it is so much more fun this way!!!!

Don’t you worry about publishing all the details of your meetings with your lovers without their knowledge or consent. Or do they know about it?

None of my lovers know about my diary . . . and, until recently, I didn’t worry about it at all really.
I have always tried to be careful not to mention too many specifically personal, or private, or family things about my lover(s). And I supposed I justified my diary as just an extension of the excitement and fun and fulfilment that our lifestyle has given us. They each benefit from the fun and excitement of our meetings, so I didn’t see any harm in allowing me to further express and indulge that fun and exhibitionistic side of my nature, with (firstly), J and then with people occasionally reading my diary.

But just lately, since meeting D, I have begun to wonder if perhaps my writing about our meetings is actually an intrusion on their own private feelings and life. It has been harder recently to sit down and actually start writing (although once I do start I can’t stop until I finish!!!). J begs me to keep writing, but I am beginning to wonder, and ponder if it is really right . . . ???

I will always try to answer any sensible questions and add them here if I think they are appropriate !!